The Last Day of January!!!
Boy, am I glad to get this month behind me! Now only one more month without Gary!!! I just hope I am totally back to normal by the time he gets here.
When picking my son up from school today I ran into one of the teenage girls from my old caseload. She looked great and we were obviously SO glad to see one another. We always had a great bond (not the same little girl I mentioned in a previous post). I was the first person she disclosed her years of sexual abuse to. We went through her pregnancy (her's, not mine obviously) and a court trial together and I was always amazed by her strength. I see her every couple of months or so since I left work, but now she is attending my son's high school so we'll be seeing each other most days. Today she told me she was going to ask her "new" social worker if I could be her foster parent (she currently has a great foster parent who both she & I adore). I explained to her that that probably wouldn't be the greatest idea since she is so close in age to my son, I'm not licensed for foster care, etc. However, she just kept saying that she was going to talk to her "new" social worker about it. This is the dilema of social work. How do you care about these kids and sometimes become their psuedo parent while still keeping those boundaries in place? This is one of the reasons I left this job. I just can't let these kids go. One of my other teenagers (one that I have mentioned in previous posts) called last night and left a message for me to call her. Even though she is very near finalizing her adoption with a great family, who she loves dearly, that bond is always there. It's just hard to figure out what my real "role" is now. I have four of these teenage girls that I maintain contact with (we live in a small county). It's just hard to figure out what my new "role" is. I'm not the social worker, of course I'm not the mother, I'm not the friend......I just don't know what I am to them now. Most importantly, I don't want to do anything to hinder their bonding to their new families. But, on the other hand, I don't want in any way to appear to be rejecting them because in all four cases, I was the first adult that they were able to trust. Wow, I miss that job and I don't miss that job!
Hugs,
Cara
When picking my son up from school today I ran into one of the teenage girls from my old caseload. She looked great and we were obviously SO glad to see one another. We always had a great bond (not the same little girl I mentioned in a previous post). I was the first person she disclosed her years of sexual abuse to. We went through her pregnancy (her's, not mine obviously) and a court trial together and I was always amazed by her strength. I see her every couple of months or so since I left work, but now she is attending my son's high school so we'll be seeing each other most days. Today she told me she was going to ask her "new" social worker if I could be her foster parent (she currently has a great foster parent who both she & I adore). I explained to her that that probably wouldn't be the greatest idea since she is so close in age to my son, I'm not licensed for foster care, etc. However, she just kept saying that she was going to talk to her "new" social worker about it. This is the dilema of social work. How do you care about these kids and sometimes become their psuedo parent while still keeping those boundaries in place? This is one of the reasons I left this job. I just can't let these kids go. One of my other teenagers (one that I have mentioned in previous posts) called last night and left a message for me to call her. Even though she is very near finalizing her adoption with a great family, who she loves dearly, that bond is always there. It's just hard to figure out what my real "role" is now. I have four of these teenage girls that I maintain contact with (we live in a small county). It's just hard to figure out what my new "role" is. I'm not the social worker, of course I'm not the mother, I'm not the friend......I just don't know what I am to them now. Most importantly, I don't want to do anything to hinder their bonding to their new families. But, on the other hand, I don't want in any way to appear to be rejecting them because in all four cases, I was the first adult that they were able to trust. Wow, I miss that job and I don't miss that job!
Hugs,
Cara
posted by Cara @ 4:41 PM
1 Comments:
At 6:48 AM,
heavenlydm said…
Have you considered mentoring? I did it with teen girls for three years and it was one of the most rewarding experiences and helped me grow closer to my own daughter. The nice thing is - you get to set up the parameters and you decide what your commitment is. This way you could be in their lives for however long you decide and with great purpose.
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