10 Years Younger

I'm back from my surgery and amazed at how good I feel. My doctor and the nursing staff all were amazed at how quickly I recovered and attributed it to my being in good physical shape. I am almost one week post-op now and about to go bananas to get out and about!!! I lost another couple of pounds - probably that pesky uterus. Now that I'm out of surgery, I realized how horrible I have been feeling for the longest time. I hope none of you other ladies out there suffer like I did just because one doctor tells you there is nothing wrong with you. I've been having so many female problems for years and I went to a male doctor and he said, "Oh, that doesn't seem abnormal." Well, my new doctor assured me that things were "abnormal" if I thought they were, because I know my own body and what is normal and abnormal for it. As it turned out, there was something wrong with me - adenomyosis. Which is a real condition that generally doesn't show up on most tests and can really only be diagnosed after a hysterectomy. It can also be very painful and cause lots of problems. So, I'm kicking myself for waiting 3 years between that first and second opinion. But, I must say, I already feel 10 years younger.

My mother came out to stay with me during my surgery and my father stayed with my kids. I only spent one night in the hospital - although I was offered 2 nights. While under my self-controlled morphine drip, I spilled my guts to my mother. I really cleared the air. I talked a lot about never feeling that I could meet her standards and about my battle with anorexia. The conversation was pretty one-sided, but I think it went well and she left Saturday and didn't seem to have any hard feelings about any of it. She said that I had a total different perception of what she usually means when she says things. Isn't that the way with all mothers and daughters??!! Help me out ladies. I see this with my own daughters. I guess those are things that I'll just have to continue to work on as a mother and a daughter - it's hard being either or both. Also, I think I have got to put in more work about not defining myself by the way I look - that is my daily struggle.

Thanks to all of you who kept me in your thoughts and prayers during this time. I feel like a million bucks - well, maybe 1/2 a million. When my doctor releases me to get back to my daily life I'll probably feel like a million! lol

Hugs,
Cara